Mercury in Retrograde

“Jeremy Piven suffered ’shocking levels’ of mercury in his system from eating too much sushi and Chinese herbs, forcing him to leave the Broadway play Speed-the-Plow, his doctor tells People magazine.”

Note to self: When consuming massive amounts of sushi, just say no to herbs of the Chinese variety.

I’m sure this is actually a serious health scare, but I can’t help but laugh. Sorry, Ari…

Old People Rule!

“Elizabeth Taylor, 76, drank tequila shots and apple martinis over dinner at gay landmark The Abbey Food and Bar in West Hollywood. She was sporting cowboy boots, a black fur coat, horse-print leggings, and a cowboy hat.”

I hope to be this awesome when I’m 76. Seriously.